ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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