Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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