i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize