Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
