I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
