Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time