Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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