I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
