My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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