I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize