Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize