Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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