her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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