That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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