my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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