TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
