apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize