My friends, they love my intelligence
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
