I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Boobs are out for the taking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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