He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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