Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
