they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
