YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
