Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
