From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize