guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
pop tarts are not kleenex
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
