You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
