Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize