So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
