I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
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