There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
