Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
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