So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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