I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize