its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
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I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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