White coat. Heels.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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