Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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