I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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