I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
whose ass print is on the piano?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
