nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Randomize
