At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Life is so much better after having sex.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Slut skills are useful in every country.
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He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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