come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP