You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
