Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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