This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I haven't been this sober since birth.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
