you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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