first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
literally had 100 drinks last night.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize