nutella sex= disaster
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
