Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Randomize
