Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
