new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
What a dumb baby whore.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
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